There is nothing that is comparable to sex: the feeling is heavenly, and the tremor-inducing release of serotonin and other endorphins boosts your immune system and decreases anxiety and stress.
However, it has the potential to be both the most amazing or the most unfulfilling aspect of your life. It can be a source of ultimate pleasure or a frustrating, empty experience…
Research shows that not many women realize the full potential of sex:
A survey by Durex Sexual Wellbeing revealed that one in three women are turned off from sex. The study showed that these women feel that the kind of sex on offer is not really what excites them. According to Dr. Andres Pennington, even though all women are capable of having an orgasm: almost one in twenty women have never had one.
If you are not getting enough sex or the enjoyment that you know you deserve from sex, remember that sex is more than sexual chemistry. It is not easy to get sex right every time, but with a few tips and tricks, you can take your sexual experience to the next level.
So, how is your sex life? Are you doing it often? Are you doing it correctly? What else is there to try?
Here are some tips to ensure that your bedroom experience will be as pleasurable as possible for you and your man:
The Shortened Guide to Better Sex and other Sex Tips for Women
Anybody who believes that the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach flunked his geographyRobert Byrne
For men, sex is mostly a physical attraction, while for women it is an emotional connection. A woman must, therefore, go an extra mile and work on the man’s physical parts for a satisfactory sexual experience.
To optimize your sexual experience, appreciate your man’s prowess in bed and praise him. This will boost his ego and spike his desire for you by manifold.
The pressure of satisfying you may turn off your man’s desire. Do you want to eliminate this fear? Guide him to your erogenous spots and do so with caution without puncturing his self-esteem.
Never use sex as a bargaining tool. You are the only source of your man’s physical pleasure.
Sex: The thing that takes up the least of time and causes the most amount of trouble.John Barrymore
A woman’s orgasm can last as long as twenty seconds whereas a man’s will be over the entire experience in just three minutes. Furthermore, a woman is capable of having multiple climaxes in a single romp.
How to prolong your orgasm
If your climaxes are too short, delay gratification by edging. Edging involves pulling back at the last moment when you near the orgasm. Repeating this process two or three times will build a longer more powerful orgasm.
Even though one in twenty women have never had an organism, every woman is capable of having an orgasm. Many women just have discovered how.
For women, the best aphrodisiacs are words. The G-spot is in their ears. He who looks for it below there is wasting his time.Isabel Allende
Your sexual malfunction is not in your mechanical part. Sex therapists assert that eighty percent of your orgasm is tied up with psychological issues that you may be experiencing:
- Your cultural and religious programming
- Your past sexual experiences
- How comfortable you are with your body
- How safe you feel with the guy that you are having sex with
- Where you are having sex
Although your libido may decrease as you get older, the quality of your orgasms only gets better
To enhance your sexual performance and intensify your orgasm, increase the ‘love drug’ oxytocin in your system. All you need is more hugging, kissing, cuddling and other bonding activities.
Among men, sex results in intimacy: among women intimacy results in sex.Barbara Cartland
Quick tips to get more out of sex
Did you know? Your clitoris has 8,000 nerve endings, which is twice the number in a penis
According to Hilda Hutcherson, author of ‘Pleasure,’ a quick hot bath or placing a warm washcloth over your vulva for a few minutes before sex leads to increased pleasure. Heat will boost blood flow to your vagina, leading to increased lubrication and heightened sensitivity.
Take advantage of the first two days of your cycle when your testosterone levels surge, your breasts and clitoris become extra sensitive, and your libido soars. Your orgasms will be intense, and multiples are much more likely.
Stop defining yourself as an orgasm:
- You are much more than orgasm. The enjoyment you experience during sex should not be desecrated by the failure to be orgasmic.
- Stop exaggerating how bad it is not to have an orgasm
Sex without love is an empty experience, but as far as empty experiences go, it’s one of the best.
Did you know? Men have a spot which when stimulated causes untold pleasure? The organ is known as the prostate, and it is located right under a man’s bladder. You can reach it by placing a finger inside the guy’s anus and moving it in a circular motion.
Research shows that if you are having trouble reaching orgasm when having sex, wearing a pair of socks makes it easier for you to orgasm by warming your feet.
You should never compare your sexual sex experiences to another person’s. Comparison is the thief of joy. No two women experience sex the same way.
Great lovers are made, not born. Sex is not effortless. Educate yourself about your body and your man’s body
Do not compare your man with your current partners. As much as your past experiences can be a good foundation of your sexual skills, realize that different things work for different men.
Sex relieves tension – love causes it.Woody Allen
Did you know? Sex increases your memory. During sex, blood flows to the hippocampal region of the brain, which improves your ability to remember words and phrases
‘Society' and it's impact on our sex lives
It may seem like there is no connection, but images in the media and our general perception of what society thinks is OK and normal impacts our sex lives.
Even though you may feel as though your body doesn’t look great at the moment, do not allow this consciousness to spoil your sexual experience. When you are making love, your man is not worried about any imperfections that you may have. Besides, his body is probably not perfect either.
Forget about ‘normal’ sex and do not feel ashamed about your quirk’s and fantasies. In a study:
- 11% of the women had tried bondage
- 20% of the respondents had used a blindfold
- 30% of the women had had anal sex
- 62% of the women admitted to masturbating three to four times a week
- 18% indicated that they preferred oral sex
Sex is perfectly natural. It’s something that’s pleasurable. It’s enjoyable, and it enhances a relationship. So, why don’t we learn as much as we can about it and become comfortable with ourselves as sexual human beings, because we are all sexual?Sue Johansson
Sex should feel amazing. If it’s painful at all, you should find out why. It could be a small matter of adding a lubricant or changing positions.
Be squeaky clean. Keeping everything fresh will optimize your sexual experience.
Also be prepared for things that may happen during sex like wanting to go to the bathroom or the phone ringing
It is not all up to your man. Share the responsibility and take on a portion of your own sexual pleasure.
They only unnatural sex act is that which you cannot perform.Alfred Kinsey
Between work projects, children, and other pressures, amazing sex may seem like a fantasy. I hope these tips will help you turn up the heat again. These insights encourage you to challenge your existing thoughts about sex, and reflect on what you are doing right or wrong.
And remember, no one has it all together when it comes to sex. Sex can be confusing and surprising even for the most experienced among us. There is no one size fit all.
Different partners bring with them sets of demands, expectations, and experiences.
Luckily, with excellent communication and all the self-help materials available out there, you should be able to have a fantastic sexual experience.