8 Things Guys Do to Get Your Attention – How You Can Hack the Male Mind

Things Guys Do to Get Your Attention

Things Guys Do to Get Your Attention

HE LIKES ME…………… He likes me not.

Few things are as tortuous and confusing as trying to figure out whether a guy is attracted to you or not.

The situation is further complicated by the fact that men are not the greatest communicators. Guys find it especially difficult to tell girls how they really feel about them. As a result, they are more comfortable communicating their feelings with their actions.

While some signs of attraction and interest are more evident than others, it is pretty easy to know when a guy likes you when you know what signs to look out for.

1. It is in his body language

The body language speaks volumes where words fail. So, pay close attention and see if you can identify some of the following subtle behaviors:

  • Eye contact: If a guy likes you, he will use eye contact to convey interest. Naturally, people’s eyes wander around the room, but if it feels like he cannot tear his eyes from you, he might just be attracted to you.
  • A light touch: People touch the people they like. There is no better way to determine that a guy has romantic feelings towards you than when he looks for every excuse to touch you. He will pick lint off your jacket, gently guide you towards the door, and regularly brush your arm ‘accidentally.’
  • The way he faces: Does he typically face you with his feet when he’s in the same vicinity? Feet direction is thought to be more likely a subconscious choice due to their distance from the brain. If his feet are usually facing you, then it is an indication that he is thinking of you.
  • Leaning inward: A guy will lean towards a girl that he likes and distance himself from the ones he does not like. He will angle his pelvis to face you when you are standing and lean in when you are seated.

2. He asks you personal questions

A guy who is interested in you will want to know everything about you. He will, therefore, ask you a lot of questions. By enquiring about your personal life, he is hoping to get to know you better and also create a bond between the two of you. And he will want to know about it all:  your childhood, your family, your goals and even your fears.

Furthermore, this says a lot about his intelligence: he knows that as human beings, we have many sides and shades within us that we offer to the world. Asking questions is his way of trying to know the real you.

Asking you about yourself also indicates that he is enjoying his time with you. It is an easy and stress-free way to sustain a conversation and keep the dialogue flowing.

While listening to you helps him to get to know you better, it also gives him the opportunity to show you how much you mean to him.

Does he ask you questions about your work? About your family? About your upbringing? Does he recall specific information and topics you once talked about? Does he remember the smallest details from your past conversations? Yep, he is definitely falling for you.

3. He does everything to stand out and fend off competition.

A guy who likes you will do everything to impress you. He might show off his physical strength and bring up stories and anecdotes about his life that he knows will make him stand out. In some cases, even the most modest guy will become a bit of a show off around you. This is especially the case if a guy is the quiet type; he will feel compelled to brag about his accomplishments to impress you.

A guy who is attracted to you will also amp the risk factor when he is around you. It is not uncommon for a guy to intentionally put himself in the face of danger to catch your attention. Guys know women are attracted to bold and fearless males. And they are likely to deploy this strategy when an opportunity arises.

It is for the same reason that a guy will leap mindlessly to your defense, in something that he has no idea what it is all about; whether it is in social situations or on social media. He wants you to see him as your knight in shining armor.

Does he drive recklessly fast when he is with you? Now you know; he is very attracted to you.

4. He pays special attention to you.

If you are in a crowd of people, a man who is smitten will give you more attention than anyone else present. You can test it out: Move away from the group that he is in. Say you need a drink or something. Then don’t return. If he likes you, he will try to catch your eye across the room, or even follow you.

He will be sensitive to your moods, and he can tell when you are going through something. So, the next time he is pushing you to tell him whether everything is ok, take it as a compliment and not nagging. It just means that he cares much more than you probably realized.

Does he notice that you have changed the way you do your hair? Or that you are putting on different makeup? Wonder no more: he definitely likes you.

5. He wants to make your life easier

A guy who likes you will take care of you to his best of abilities. He will go out of his way to do nice things for you. It could be something as small as carrying your shopping bags. Does the guy:

  • Open the car door for you?
  • Open up the water bottle for you?
  • Bring you coffee?
  • Give you a ride home?
  • Help to set up your new TV?
  • Lend you his jacket when it is cold?
  • Offer to drive you to the airport when you have to catch a flight?

These small gestures indicate one thing: the guy is into you.

A quick note on shy guys

When I grew up I was shy. And shy guys act a little differently around girls that they like.

6. He may completely ignore you

Fear of rejection is a big thing for guys, especially when they are in public. It takes a lot of boldness for a guy to put himself in a position to be publicly rejected. So what does the guy do: he ignores you completely. Or he could ignore you when you are in the larger society, but talk to you when you are alone.

7. He opens up when you two are alone (or when he feels comfortable)

Is he completely oblivious to your presence when there are other people around but cheers up the moment the two of you are alone together? No doubt, he likes you, but he is intimidated, shy and/or scared.

This doesn’t make him any less of a man. He may have simply grown up with an overbearing parent/sibling/relative and simply isn’t sure what to do next with you.

8. He tries to predict something about you or tell you about yourself

If he doesn’t know better, it’s his way of telling you that he has thought about you. It can be cute (and less annoying) if you think of it that way.

Final word

In a study published by psychological Science, researchers discovered that women underestimate the amount of romantic interest shown to them by men. As such, by the time you start noticing gestures that indicated that a guy likes you, he will be deeply attracted to you.

You, therefore, need to decide quickly on what you will do about the situation. If you are interested in the guy, give your own signs that you are also into him. Meet him halfway; reciprocate by doing nice things for him.

If you are not interested in the guy, do not try to take advantage of his interest in you. Let him know immediately, and you might just get yourself a wonderful friend.

More information

Do you ever feel like you don't understand men? Like you have no idea how he's feeling or what he will do next? If this sounds like you then this short video will change your relationships with men forever.

In it, James Bauer describes the number one driving force in a mans brain and how he tries to satisfy it in everything that he does. Watch it now, your future self will thank you!

Thanks for reading Things Guys Do to Get Your Attention. If you have any comments questions or queries you can contact me here.

“The Apps Don’t Work” – 7 Old-Fashioned Ways How To Find A Date Offline

The apps dont work - old fashioned ways to find a date offline

The apps dont work - old fashioned ways to find a date offline

YOU'VE TRIED ALL THE apps. The new ones and the popular ones. You’ve tried the older style websites and even the specialist niche websites…

And you're still single…

Maybe it’s time to consider some technology-free options. So in that vein, here are 7 old-fashioned ways how to find a date offline, and meet that someone special

Volunteering

Volunteering is fantastic in more ways than one:

  • You are giving back. Immense satisfaction comes with giving back to the community
  • You enjoy the company of like-minded individuals.
  • Volunteering allows you to meet your partner in the noblest way.
  • You have the privilege to know your partner quickly and in the most natural state: no dating games.

Volunteering places you on the path of people who have the same values, spirit, and mindset as your own. When you connect with a potential partner through volunteering, you start out knowing that the two of you have some values in common and a load of similar experiences to look back on.

In 2013, Voluntary Service Overseas (VSO) realized that a number of their volunteers had fallen in love while volunteering abroad. During Valentine’s Day, the organization made this the theme of their message. They encouraged single people to volunteer, telling them that on top of helping a community to fight poverty, they could possibly find love.

So get out there and find something that you would love to do to give back to the society, volunteer and possibly fall in love.

Go to places of worship and weddings

You may not even be religious for all you know, but that’s beside the point. Places of worship and weddings are a great place to find potential partners. The sense of familiarity that comes with the church and related ceremonies means that a lot of barriers are already broken. As such, even complete strangers have a sense of familiarity with them.

When you see a man that you are attracted to, you will have the confidence to approach him. Being in a familiar territory also encourages the guys to approach.

Tip: Try to sit somewhere visible where there is some space for a single guy to sit next to. Also, make a rule to sit next to the first single guy you see; and guess what, you might just change your life.

Take hobbies that get you interacting with people

The best partner is the one who shares your lifestyle and your preference in how you spend your time and money. Making time for your hobbies allows you to connect with like-minded people. Challenge yourself to invest in your social calendar.

Having shared interests is a great strength in any long-term relationship: take up salsa dancing, attend vintage car rallies or go to cheer your favorite team. You will be off to a good start if you meet a guy doing something you love. Your shared interest gives you a ready topic of conversation to get things going.

People at a party - how to find a date offline

Attend your friends' parties

Meeting a guy through your friends can be a real bonus: You have something in – common – the mutual friend and your friend can vouch for his character. According to research conducted by Mic in 2015, more 18 – 24 years old met their current partners through mutual friends than through any other means.

Meeting a potential partner through a friend is reassuring because you can trust your friend’s judgment.

Having a friend’s stamp of approval of a partner is not only helpful in making the initial connection; it is also important once the relationship gets going. Research shows that people who meet through friends feel more supported in their relationships.

Woman having a good time at a party - image for how to find a date offline

Sit at the bar

You probably already spend a good bit of time out at bars and clubs socializing. But, if you are more intentional, your visit to the bar can be extra productive, and you could meet someone special.

  • Do not visit just any club. Choose a place that puts time, effort and thought into the establishment. This is the kind of place where you are likely to meet thoughtful, hardworking guys who value themselves.
  • Sit at the bar if you can. The bar is the point of focus in the room, and it is much more inviting than the individual tables. Even the most confident man will hesitate before approaching a woman seated at a table. The bar will encourage a guy to approach and start a natural conversation.
  • If you are a regular at a club, befriend the bartender. The girls and guys behind the bar know everything. They would be a perfect source of intel on potential guys. They could not only point you in the right direction but also steer you away from harm’s way.

Alumni events

Alumni events are great for meeting great guys. An alumni event is designed around talking to others and exchanging information. It is, therefore, an easy way to make a connection that could turn into a long-lasting school romance.

Whether it is the graduate school, college or high school, or even the elementary school, an alumni event is a non-stressful way to meet a quality man. Why? The guys at these events already share with you a fundamental commonality and connection.

Whichever guy you bump into, you already have some insight about him. Also, you may know some of the same people, which will help to increase the bond that the two of you share.

Church functions

You may not be religious, but places of worship are a great place to meet great guys. However, you have to be strategic about your sitting position. Try to sit somewhere visible where a single guy can sit next to or near you. In fact, why don’t you sit next to the first single guy that you see? You might just make his day.

Weddings are also significant potential functions to meet great guys. If you know the bride or groom separately, you are able to meet an entirely new network of the couple’s friends. The fact that they were invited to the wedding in the first place means that they are quality guys.

Final thoughts

Finding the right guy is not the end. More work will go into building a great relationship. Consider the following tips for building a healthy, long-lasting relationship.

  • Be mindful of the law of attraction. You use the law of attraction in your love life all the time; whether you are aware of it or not. Question is, what are you attracting?

You can attract love, companionship, and joy or you can attract loneliness. Desperation and complaining; ‘I am single and lonely, and it seems there is no one out there for me’ will frustrate all your good efforts to find a great relationship.

How many desperate people have you seen in great relationships?

  • Seek for partnership, not just romance. It is exciting to have a guy who sweeps you off your feet. However, finding a partner who likes to give and take, who seeks your opinion and considers it, is even a greater blessing.

Instant sexual attraction often fades: Most good love is a slow burn.

  • When you meet someone, do not hurry things along. When you connect with a guy, allow that connection to grow. Do not play games, apply seduction techniques or manipulate the man.
  • Date smart: watch out for the red flags. Red flags indicate that the relationship will not grow into a healthy, long-lasting love. Pay close attention to the guy and trust your instincts. If you ever feel undervalued, insecure or ashamed, it is probably a good idea to reevaluate the relationship.
    • Is the guy alcohol dependent?
    • Is he having trouble honoring his commitments?
    • Is he excessively jealous about your other interests?
    • Is the relationship exclusively sexual?

Lastly:

Invest in yourself. Even if you find a great guy, you will not have a great relationship if there are some parts of you missing. You do not need to be with someone to feel content. You must be whole by yourself.

Do not look for someone to heal you from your insecurities; what you need is to heal from your insecurities so that you can find someone.

Thanks for reading my guide on how to find a date offline. If you have any questions or queries, then contact me here

5 Questions To Ask Your Future Husband…

Questions to Ask a Guy Before Deciding Hes the One - Woman on a Date with Man

Questions To Ask Your Future Husband - Woman on a Date with Man

WOULDN'T IT BE GREAT IF the men you dated came with stickers?

Stickers that say, ‘I am not trustworthy’, ‘I am never getting married’, ‘I will end up cheating on you!’, or something like ‘I am a man of integrity, and I will be a great husband and dad’.

Well, the stickers may not exist in the real sense of the word; but the messages do. Lauren Frances indicates that men give clues that can help you know their personality, interpret their agenda and spot any red flags. Better still, you can obtain all the information that you need from your potential partner simply by asking him questions.

Men have their own relationship goals, and they would be happy to share them with a woman. Many women do not know where a relationship is going because they never ask, and only muster the courage to ask three or four years later.

In ‘Act like a Lady, Think like a Man’, Steve Harvey interviews a lot of men who were self-proclaimed ‘players’. All the ‘players’ indicated that if the women had quizzed them upfront about their intentions, they would have told them right away that they were not looking for anything serious. The guys indicated that the women they dated didn’t ask the essential questions for fear of running the guys off, so they (the guys) just strung the women along.

Why you should ask questions

Just because you love each other does not mean you will automatically create a great life together. Many times, great relationships end despite people loving each other deeply; one is too ambitious while the other is not ambitious enough, one wants children, but the other one does not, one is self-driven while the other one is a slob. So you see, you better ask the questions early enough before you invest so much time, effort and emotions.

Lose the fear

The first step is to get over the fear of losing a man by asking him important questions. In every area of life, taking chances to get what you want is much more productive than sitting around being too scared. Just stop being afraid already. If being clear about your requirements means you risk him walking away, then it is a risk you are going to have to take. In any case, you will only scare the wrong guys off.

What to do

To get the most out of your relationships, you must change your strategy. Start by ensuring that the man is really clear from the word go about what he wants out of his life and his relationship with you.

Q1: What are your plans for the future?

This is truly an important question; you need to know whether you and him share goals and dreams. From his answer, you will able to determine whether:

  • You fit in his plan
  • What role you can play in the plan.
  • You need to remove yourself from the equation.

The man you want to involve yourself with is the one who has a solid plan; one that you can see yourself in. If he has no vision, you do not want to be part of that confusion and mayhem. He is not going anywhere and sooner or later, you will be stuck too.

Q2: How do you feel about me?

This is a question that you will ask after a few dates. If he cannot tell how he feels about you after a month of dating, then he does not feel anything for you; he just wants something. At this point, you are not looking for him to confess his undying love for you; it is too soon anyway.

However, you can expect answers like: I love talking to you, I always wonder what you are doing, and I feel a little better whenever you come around. In other words, his answer should make you feel fantastic. He may not be in love with you just yet, but he will let you know that he is crazy about you and he wants to pursue a long-term relationship with you.

If you realize that his feelings for you are barely scratch the surface, and he is nowhere near where you want him to be, step on the brakes until you hear the things that you need to hear from him.

Q3: Do you believe in marriage?

This sounds like a scary question to ask, but look at this way; you are not telling him that you want to get married to him now, you are only asking him what he believes.

This question will help you to establish whether the guy wants to get married in the first place. That he is in a relationship with you does not necessarily mean that he wants to get married. Also, the fact that he has been dating you for a while is no guarantee that he wants to marry YOU.

Q4: How do you feel about having children?

Over the last few decades, things have changed, and more people feel less need to have children. If you want children, it is best to find out if your man wants children as well before you commit to him. Do not make any assumptions.

If you realize that both of you want children, great! Find out more about what he thinks of children:

  • How many children does he want?
  • How does he feel about having all boys? Or all girls?
  • What would he do if you discovered that as a couple you could not have children?
  • Is he open to alternative ways of having children; like adoption?

Q5: What are your thoughts about religion?

Religion is a big issue, and it is ironic that many couples do not discuss it before committing. If religion is especially important to you, it is prudent to ask all the relevant questions.

  • Does he practice any religion?
  • If the two of you practice different religions, who will be willing to switch to the other’s?
  • What religion will your children practice?

Quick tip: Ask your guy about his relationship with God. If you realize that the man has no relationship with God, has no belief system or guiding force in his life, this might be a huge problem.

  • What moral barometer does he answer to?
  • What makes him feel whole?
  • What is going to make him do right by you?

By all means, you can date a guy who does not go to church or have a relationship with God, but if his core beliefs do not match with yours, you are likely to have challenges in your relationship.

Final thoughts

  • Men love to talk about themselves; they do this because they know that to get you, they have to impress you. Allow him to impress. The more inquisitive and interested you are, the more the information he will give you.
  • Believe what you hear. Do not stick around hoping that the guy will change his mind about something down the road. For instance, if he does not want kids, he will probably not change his mind, regardless of how deeply he feels about you.
  • Do not be afraid of the answers you might get. See the answers as a way to plan your future. Be proud that you are proactively creating a future that you will love.
  • Do your best to be equally honest about your expectations from the start. Be absolutely clear that your man understands that you are looking for long-term relationship, marriage, children…. whatever it is, define it for him so that you are on the same page.

Lastly:

The reason why you are asking all these questions is because you like a guy and you want to find out if the two of you have a future together. You do not intend to make him feel uncomfortable.

So, do not ask all the questions in one sitting and do not ask them in a formal way. You are not interrogating the guy. Be tactful; make the conversation as casual and as fun as you can.

Thanks for reading this guide on Questions To Ask Your Future Husband, if you have any comments or questions you can contact me here.