How to Flirt with a Guy – The Modern Day Guide to Interacting with Men

How to flirt with a guy - girl and guy at resteraunt sharing a meal

How to flirt with a guy - girl and guy at resteraunt sharing a meal

YOU ARE OUT WITH your friends and an incredibly gorgeous guy catches your eye.

But he is not making a move.

You size him up, and you just have this strong feeling that you would hit it off. . What do you do?

If you still think that sitting there quietly while looking cute, smiling slightly from time to time, will draw the guy to you, get him to take care of everything and show you the time of your life, you are mistaken.

After all, we are in the 21st century. This means that women need to be more proactive in attracting a man.  Take for instance the following myth most women hold onto:

The myth; if a guy likes me, he will come over.

Most women continue to live under the impression that making the first move is exclusively a guy thing.

They believe that if he likes them, he will approach, and if he is not approaching, it’s because he isn’t interested. This is completely untrue. A guy could be attracted to you so much and still not make a move.

Women grossly overestimate male confidence. They assume that all guys find it super easy to approach girls. The reality is that men find approaching much harder than girls could ever realize. Everybody fears embarrassment and rejection.

Did you know: The more a guy is attracted to you, the less likely he is to approach you? The hardest woman for a guy to approach is the one he likes the most. Think about that!

Why do women find it difficult to flirt?

Many girls look at flirtation as an audition for a relationship, and they instantly become afraid of being rejected.

The better way to look at flirting is merely as a way of showing a guy your interest and curiosity and inquiring about his: it is not classless, and it is not desperation.

When you flirt with a man, you are not asking him for marriage and children; you are only telling him that you find him interesting and you would love to spend some time with him.

Did you know: when you do not flirt with a man you like and make it clear, you are more likely to end up in the dreaded friend zone?

Get his attention

The first step is to get the guy’s attention. Make eye contact for a few seconds and then look away.

If you look back at him a few moments later and he is still looking at you, stay locked on his eyes for a short while. Then give him a little smirk and look away again. If you catch his eye the third time, it is all you need to know that he is interested in you.

Note: Keep an eye out of a female companion who might have stepped away to the bathroom before you flirt with the guy.

What if he doesn't approach…?

There are many reasons why men do not approach women they are interested in.

If he doesn't, and you have made eye contact with him then you have a couple of options.

  1. You can move yourself to the edge of your group to give him the invitation to come over to you
  2. You can go to a neutral third place by yourself (i.e. the bar or somewhere else

Should you approach him?

Yes, you can approach him. Although some women think that approaching a guy is quite challenging and sets the wrong mood for the encounter.

The truth is that you will only know the answer to any of your questions (‘What if he finds me weird, aggressive, desperate or slutty?' What will I say to him?') by talking to him.  

By actually talking to him, and if he's not going to approach then you will need to.

If you allow your fears to conquer you, you will let a guy who might be a great date, which could turn into a great relationship simply walk away. Without any chance of knowing what could have happened.

How sad is this! Do not allow the life you could probably have casually drift by.

It is becoming more and more common for women to make the first move. It isn't as taboo as it once was. If he isn't going to approach, and you really want to see what he is like, then go get 'em.

A quick note on how men feel when approached

Men love it. It's an ego boost for them that they very rarely get.

Turn the tables

The reason why women fear flirting with guys is fear of rejection. While this is normal, you can turn the tables.

Instead of wondering whether he will like you, ask yourself:

  • Do I like him?
  • Does he seem interesting?
  • Does he look like someone I would enjoy spending time with?

The reality is that it's your choice. So turn this from being liked to being selective, and you will automatically feel empowered.

Dazzle with conversation

What you say and the questions you ask should be designed to help you get a sense of the guy, while at the same time drawing him out.

Many people think the first conversation you have with someone should be a lot of questions. I disagree. Instead, talk about:

  • The environment you find yourself in
  • The way he is dressed
  • Something completely random
  • Hobbies, passions and habits (as long as they aren't serious)
  • Something that you noticed about him (although keep it very broad, you don't want to come across as a stalker. A good rule for this is to make sure it couldn't be argued. i.e. make a comment on where he is standing, a t-shirt he is wearing etc.)

Keeping it light and fun will help draw him out. This will help you:

  1. Discover who is actually is sooner
  2. Help him build a stronger connection with you sooner
  3. Keep him engaged in the conversation with you

Need his help

Guys love (and need) to feel helpful. Needing the help of a guy is an excellent way to start a conversation.

Here you can ask questions because they lead into experiences and aren't like a job interview. Ask him:

  • To scan the crowd for your friend in a yellow sweater and playfully complain that you are just too short to look yourself
  • What he thinks of where you two are
  • If he can fix something… (your phone is in another language, how did that happen… 🙂
  • Where the bathroom is (if your stuck for something else)

Guys just love to be needed.

Compliment him

Do you see how you use compliments to connect with other women: ‘I love you purse,’ ‘your shoes are gorgeous’………

The same works with men. Everyone wants to be complimented. A guy will be thrilled to know that you find him capable, smart, fascinating, and funny.

As you converse with him, listen to him keenly and give sincere compliments. 

  • Let him know that you agree with something he says
  • Ask him to suggest a book or a restaurant and let him know what you thought
  • Tell him that you find his job or business interesting

Note: Men rarely receive compliments from women. When you give him well thought out compliments, you will stand out, and he will take a second look.

Make plans

You do not want to achieve nothing after all the effort you have made. That is why making plans is a great idea; it gives the conversation a purpose.

It is also a great flirting tactic because it tells the guy that you want to spend some more time with him.

You can subtly introduce plan making by saying, ‘I don't believe you, I think that' something i need to see/hear/witness/experience in person'.

‘You'll have to check it (something you talked about previously) out sometime, i'm there on Thursday evenings'

How to flirt with a guy - girl and guy after workout looking at each other

When making plans, it is best to be specific:

‘See you some other time!’ is not as concrete as, ‘We should go running together.'

A flirtatious encounter should end with making plans because this sets the stage for another meeting.

Flirt with him via text

Many women find it hard to flirt over text messages considering their crush cannot hear their voice or read their body language.

However, there are many advantages to flirting over text.

Firstly, you can take your time to say the perfect thing. Also, you are not under pressure to think of immediate responses as it happens in a face to face conversation. Texts also get him thinking of you when you are not around.

Sending a guy flirting texts allows him to know what is in your mind and opens up the conversation.

First things first: is he interested in you?

Before you begin flirting with a guy via text, you need to check out whether he is at least mildly interested in you.

You will know that your crush is receptive to your flirting if he is responsive, responds to your messages without too much of a lag time and he carries on the conversation.

Message the guy in response to something he has posted

When the guy posts something on social media, take the initiative to send him a direct message instead of passively liking his post.

Let’s say he posts the picture of his dog. You could send him a direct message saying, ‘Your dog is completely adorable. What kind is she?’ Or he posts a video from a concert he attended: you can message him, ‘just saw your video from last night’s concert. I love the band. How were they?’

The key here is to include at least a question in your message so that you can open the door for further conversation.

Ask flirty questions- not job interview questions

Once you get the conversation going, ask interesting questions. The key is to avoid asking questions that will require ‘yes’ or ‘no’ answers. Your questions should be more specific.

Great questions make him choose, and that choice says something about himself.

instead of asking him, ‘Do you love movies?’ You could ask him, ‘Star Wars or Star Trek?’, ‘Rom Com or Thriller?', ‘Documentary or Drama?'

These dilemma questions make him take a side, and usually defend it. Which is a great way to know more about someone, in a flirty kind of way.

Good topics to explore in the beginning include hobbies, career, and family.

Leading questions

As your conversation and relationship progresses, the questions can lead him. ‘Why are you so cute?’ ‘Our first kiss is going to be epic, don’t you think so?’ ‘What would you do if I asked you to come over? I want to have this conversation in person?’

Be a little suggestive

There are subtle ways you can show interest in a guy over text. For instance, if he says he is eating pizza for dinner, you can say you wish you were eating the pizza instead of whatever you are having.

You can also hint at sexy things without being blatant. If you did not see his message right away, you could tell him you are sorry you missed his message, but you have just got out of the shower.

This does not outright flirt, but it is a sly way of making him think about you in the shower.

Send him picture texts

Picture texts are a fun way to stay engaged with your crush. Saying your dog looks adorable when sleeping can never be as captivating as sending him the real picture.  

Always ensure you look your best in the photos that you send to him. Simley faces, emojis, meme's, and gifs are all handy for composing a witty message and showing your intent.

Open the door to take things off chat

You do not want to remain flirting over text for too long. Fortunately, there are numerous opportunities to subtly hint at taking things a notch higher.

  • Did he say that he bought something for his house; say you would love to see it sometime.
  • Does he talk about his pet all the time; joke that you are confident you would win his dog over in a heartbeat because animals love you.
  • Did he ask you a personal question: indicate that the answer is too long, you will have to tell him in person.
  • Are they screening a move you love: this is a terrific excuse to meet up.

The final thought

The best part about flirting is that you can do it over and over again. Flirting can be a fun game where any guy you see becomes fascinating, and you want to find a little bit more about him.

The more you flirt with gorgeous guys, the more it takes anxiety and pressure out of talking to them. The bonus is that you will live a more vibrant, more fulfilling, fun and exciting life. 

If you've come this far, i'd like to say thanks for reading my guide on how to flirt with a guy – the modern way. You can contact me if you have a comment or question.

How to Attract a Guy and Compel Him to Start Thinking About You

How to attract a guy - girl twirling her hair with guy at bar

How to attract a guy - girl twirling her hair with guy at bar

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

YOU HAVE DONE IT ALL… You've:

  • Dressed in soft pastel and feminine colors to make yourself more approachable
  • Smiled a lot in the presence of guys that you are attracted to
  • Tactically run your fingers through your hair delicately, and occasionally twirl strands of your tips around your finger
  • Even licked your lips and looked at the gorgeous guy in front of you under your eyebrow.

And you still didn’t get the guy to show interest. Just what are you doing wrong?

The problem is that all the advice out there about attracting men has been leading you on a wild goose chase. Most of the traditional tips encourage women to concentrate on their physical appearance to attract men.

Unfortunately, this advice treats men as shallow, sexual beings and deprives you of the opportunity to build real romantic connections.

The law of attraction

Not all men are chasing after supermodels and false impressions. Ken Page, the author of Deeper Dating, indicates that men may initially be drawn to you by your physical looks.

But by concentrating on physical appearance alone, you are distracted from cultivating science-based traits that attract love and intimacy.

The good news

The good news is that you probably already possess all the qualities that you need to attract a great guy. The truth is that you have more likely been concentrating on the not so important things…

How you can get a guy attracted to you 

Go to places that make you happy

You cannot hope to attract a great guy and yet you lock yourself at home.

Go to places that make you happy, where men happen to be. Common ground is always the basis for all conversations. Events that have some interesting context make it easier for you to meet guys.

It is hard for a guy to imagine that you have anything in common when he meets you in a mundane place like a bar. But it is easier for him to see that you have a lot in common when you meet in a bar for a fundraiser for kids with autism. Maybe you are both familiar with autism; maybe you have siblings with autism; perhaps you are both volunteers.

Suddenly you have a deeper connection- something real in common.

Sit in a strategic place

Don't stand in the corner. When you are at a social place or occasion, choose a location in a high traffic area or in the center of the room. This allows any guy who would like to talk to you do it as he is just passing or when he is ordering a drink.

Also, ensure you face the main traffic area. This is so that a guy can walk up to your face to face instead of having to tap you on the back.

If you're in a bar, sit at the bar. This is the place that everyone will visit at least once giving you more opportunities to meet someone.

In a coffee shop, sit facing the door and glance up at each person as they come in.

In the street, stroll and be aware of the people around you. Don't be afraid to say hello to the person next to you on the shuttle or while waiting in an elevator.

NOTE: You can find more places to find good men ‘offline' in this article

Be open to the world

Many girls want to attract great guys, and yet they are good at hiding. One example is going shopping when wearing earphones. Earphones are a big, ‘Do not disturb’ sign.

Instead be a girl who reads

Phones and earphones are generally not great conversation starters. Books, on the other hand, make for great conversations.

When a guy sees you engrossed in a book, he is likely to be wondering: ‘What is she reading?’ ‘What other books does she read?’ And you know what, there is only one way to find out!

How to attract a guy - girl sitting on a park bench with guy trying to meet her

Leave a seat open

When a guy wants to meet a new girl, he chooses the path of least resistance.

Is there a seat open next to you or does he have to ask you to move your coat and purse? As such, sit in the middle of an empty church pew or one of two open bar stools.

When you leave some space, you somehow communicate that you are willing to talk to people and you are open to companionship. Sitting at the farthest tucked away corner gives the impression that you are not inviting an approach.

Stand out

Whether you are walking, standing or seated, you must distinguish yourself from the others.

Wherever you are, own your space. Do not give any impression of discomfort: downcast eyes, self-hugging. Be in the present, be at ease and keep your chin up. There is nothing more attractive than a woman who owns her space and is comfortable in her skin.

Also, have fun and be genuinely happy. This automatically makes you more attractive to men. No man wants to be around a woman who is bored or agitated.

Body language

What does your body language communicate? Body language is an essential element that shapes the way a man sees you.

Are your hands relaxed or clenched? Tense hands express that you are an unhappy, stubborn person. Exposed wrists and open palms, on the other hand, project a more welcoming aura.  

A beautiful posture is one of the things that will fascinate a man. A quality man will have nothing to do with a woman who slouches. He considers her lazy, and this is a real turn off. When you are walking, ensure your stride is relaxed. This gives you presence and charisma.

While at it, do not forget eye contact and your beautiful smile. A study by the University of Missouri indicated that a woman sitting in a bar was approached by guys 20% of the time when she made eye contact with them. However, when she paired eye contact with her smile, she increased the success rate by 60%.

Be kind

Does this come as a surprise? A study by the University of Texas at Austin revealed that kindness was one of the most desired traits in a partner by men. Apparently, men associate kindness with interest in a long-term relationship and empathy in rearing children.

Small gestures that show your affection rank big with a man: Helping others, taking care of things, letting the other person order first, being polite to the server: all these tap into your nurturing element that shows him that you are a truly decent person.

A positive attitude

Research shows that positive personality traits impact perceptions of physical attractiveness.

Experts say that men are attracted to pleasant, positive and cheerful personalities in women. Guys associate these positive personality traits with not only physical attraction but also, a higher social attraction which is a major factor when a man is choosing a life partner.

Your vibe can take you from simply looking hot to being irresistible to men. Complaining, arguing, criticizing, ridiculing, bullying, condescending others: all these make you unattractive and repel men. Ultimately a man will judge you based on how he is likely to feel when he is with you. Female happiness is an aphrodisiac to men.

When you have his attention…

When you have caught the attention of your guy, let him make the next move.

There is nothing that thrills a man than chasing and getting a woman. So you must make it possible for him to chase you: Do not be easy and do not be impossible, either.

Any time you say no to something, give him enough hints to show him that you like him. However, do not string him along for too long; otherwise, he will lose interest.

Finally…

Always ensure that the guy has a good time when he is with you. If time with you feels good, he will come back for more. If it is fun and exciting, you will become the most important person in his life.

 

Thanks for reading this guide on how to attract a guy. You can contact me here if you have any questions or comments.

11 Tell Tale Signs a Shy Guy Likes You & How to Respond

signs a shy guy likes you - a guy who does not know what to do

signs a shy guy likes you - a guy who does not know what to do

SHY GUYS HAVE MANY GREAT QUALITIES…

While many women say that they want a confident man, no woman wants a loud, brash and arrogant man. They want a guy who can give them undivided attention and one with whom they can have an intelligent conversation.

Women also want a man who can be emotionally available to them. Shy guys fit the bill because they are in tune with their emotions.

Shy guys make the most loyal partners because they do not have many interests. When they love someone they give her their all.

It would be a pity to miss out on a shy guy due to the difficulty of figuring him out because he will most likely treat you like the noble princess. Read on for signs that the shy guy likes you.

11 Signs a Shy Guy Likes You

Signs a shy guy likes you - stealing glances at any opportunity

1. He creates opportunities to be around you.

If a guy likes you, you will notice that he seems to be ‘around’ you a lot. A shy guy usually stays within his group of friends, so when he breaks out of his comfort zone and approaches you, the chances are that he likes you. It takes a lot of bravery for him to even come near you.

He will show up conveniently where you like spending your time. If you mention that you love skiing on Saturdays, he will suddenly start showing up on the slopes. He likes you, and he wishes you would make the first move.

2. The body language: Actions speak louder than words.

Shy guys tend to overdo when concealing their high interest level. They make every effort to appear uninterested in a woman since engaging a woman is terrifying. However, you will pick up on some subtle signs because body language does not lie.

3. He is nervous around you.

A good sign that a shy guy likes you is if he gets nervous around you. This is because when you like someone, your coordination and generally cool demeanor can temporarily abandon you. This is much more the case for the shy guy. Your presence will literally paralyze him if he likes you. Does he drop his phone, his keys, spill on himself, and lose his cool around you – Take note.

Does he touch up his hair, scratch his face, twirl his fingers or get fidgety whenever you come close to him? This is a definite sign that he likes you, but he is very self-conscious in your presence. So, he ends up being a bag of jitters around you.

4. Secret glances

Shy guys do not want to be caught looking at you because confrontation is not their forte. But, he cannot help admiring you from afar. You will find him staring at you from across the room, but he looks away the instant you look at him.

Experts say that it is not the level of his stare that indicates his attraction for you, but the frequency. So, if you catch him staring at you more than a few times, it is a dead giveaway that he is attracted to you.

Also, you might notice he will try to make eye contact with you immediately before he steps out of room, even when he is with his friends.

5. A light touch

People touch the people they like. While a shy guy will not muster the courage to touch you, he will engage in the form of touching called preening: Picking lint off your hair, straightening your jacket. Touching is a good indicator that he likes you.

6. He stutters when he is talking to you.

A shy guy wants to say all the right things. He will, therefore, have difficulties getting the words out if he really likes you. Or he will blank out in the middle of a sentence, and he is left tripping over words and making little sense.

7. He will copy your movements

Experts call it mirroring. Watch his gestures closely: even from across the room, he will unconsciously copy your actions. If you pick up your drink to have a sip, he will do the same; if you shift in your seat; he will too. Mirroring sends unconscious signs from a guy to a woman that he likes her.

8. Your presence silences him

When a shy guy is around you, he suddenly clams up. He will be talking animatedly to his friends, but the moment he sees you, he will suddenly go quiet. What a coincidence that his story gets finished every time you walk in?

The reason is that the guy either loses his train of thought or does not want you to hear what he thinks is a lame story and think he is lame too. He merely wants to impress you, so his brain gets ahead of him, and he forgets to talk.

9. He is extra friendly to you

A shy guy may not be big on romantic gestures, but he will do random little things for you. Does he offer things like gum, water or a donut? Does he save you a seat, offer to help you with your work or offer to drop your home? This is a massive step for a shy guy, and you should definitely take it as a sign that he likes you.

This is a vulnerable move for him considering that he is introverted, but he just cannot help it. Observe how he reacts to you when you need help. If he jumps in quickly to assist you, he is deeply attracted to you.

10. He talks to you online

A face to face conversation is daunting, especially when romantic feelings are involved. For this reason, a shy guy will find it a relief to communicate with you online or via the phone.

Behind the screen he will have full confidence since there is much less pressure to respond perfectly and on the spot.

The good news is that he is working up the confidence to talk to you and soon he will comfortably have a proper conversation with you.

11. He gets jealous when you talk to other guys.

If you want to know whether a shy guy likes you, pay attention to how he reacts when you talk to other guys. Seeing other guys talking to you ticks him off. He is terrified that you might fall for one of the guys before he has an opportunity to tell you how he feels. So, how does he react? He will either stare at the guys in envy, or he will be completely bummed out that he will leave the scene.

Introverted people suffer in silence when they are jealous. The fact that he displays his jealousy is a clear indication that he is attracted to you.

How to Respond to a Shy Guys Interest

When you find out that the shy guy is attracted to you, it is time to let him know that you are allowing him to get close to you. Let him know that it is safe for him to be in your company and to talk to you.

Engage him in a conversation whenever an opportunity arises and gently coax him out of his shell. You will be shocked to realize that he probably likes to talk but experience has taught him that people are not interested in what he has to say: he, therefore, prefers to be quiet.

Also, it is crucial that you make him feel that you are talking and spending time as friends. When he feels that there are no expectations, there will be no pressure, and he will, therefore, feel safe and open up.

Finally,

Allow him to be the man: when he suggests going to a particular place, let him have his way. Chances are, this is where he is comfortable.

Do not sway him to go where many people are if he doesn’t want to. Forcing him to go to a club, for instance, is being inconsiderate of his feelings.

Be patient with your shy guy. At the end of the day, you will discover your diamond in the rough who is willing to listen and put your needs ahead of his own.

Thanks for reading this guide on signs a shy guy likes you & how to respond. If you want more information on how the male brain works then i highly recommend this short video. It's an insight only few women have on exactly what's going on in the male mind.

If you have any questions or comments you can contact me here.

The 7 Signs a Guy Likes You But is Intimidated

Signs a Guy Likes You But is Intimidated - Man not sure how to act when with beautiful woman

Signs a Guy Likes You But is Intimidated - Man not sure how to act when with beautiful woman

NOT EVERY MAN OUT THERE IS an alpha male.

Not every guy who has a crush on you has it in him to force himself out of his comfort zone and make the move he is dying to make.

Some guys are introverted, shy and self-conscious. And they find it difficult to muster even the courage to say hello especially if they are intimidated by you.

You are likely to be intimidating to a guy if:

  • You have a successful career: Some guys may think dating a successful career woman is hot, but others will feel as if it is a blow to their ego, dating a CEO while they are probably in the mid-management in their industry.
  • He thinks you look like a model: A guy with the slightest ounce of insecurity in his bones will be intimidated by a gorgeous woman. He may think that your ‘out of his league’ or that you should be dating an equally handsome and extremely rich guy… which he is not.
  • You come from a wealthy family: If you come from a prominent family or have more money than a guy, he may feel intimidated. There is the fear that he may not live up to the kind of lifestyle you are accustomed to, or he is looked down upon by you or your family.
  • You are highly intelligent: You always got straight A’s in school and graduated top of the class. Along with being accepted into every university you applied to; you graduated with distinction. While intelligence has served you well in academia and your profession, some guys fear that they cannot measure up to you, and you will eventually lose interest anyway.
  • You ooze confidence: Do you exude are an aura of confidence wherever you go? Do you get into a crowded room and every head turns in your direction? Do you instantly draw people’s attention with the way you conduct yourself? Some guys will find you difficult to approach.

Unfortunately, it is not easy to figure out the shy guy. It is frustrating to determine whether he is intimidated by you or simply disinterested. Here are a few signs that he likes you but is too scared to say anything.

1. Body language

A guy who has a crush will steal glances at you a lot. The shy one, however, will sneak glances at you when you are not looking; but if you catch him looking at you, he will break eye contact.

Also, he will be anxious and fidgety around you. This guy wants to do everything perfectly. He is trying to be the best version of himself in front of you. Do not be surprised if he breaks into a sweat when he is in your presence.

Watch how he behaves around his friends. Is he the same way with them or is he confident and comfortable around them? If he is only shy in your presence, he is definitely interested.

What to do

Try to make him feel at ease by smiling at his jokes and asking questions about him. Show him respect, and he will slowly build the confidence that he needs to pursue you. Keep it simple with him for now, he may not understand your version of flirting.

2. He seems to be ‘around’ a lot.

If you work together, your crush will hang out by your locker a lot, or maybe go to your favorite coffee place all the time. He will go out of his way to do nice things for you: like grab you a coffee or a snack, share his lunch with you, save you a seat.

He will do everything to catch your attention, but that is it. Indeed, while he may be talkative with others, he will be quiet when he is around you.

These are all good signs. A guy will only hang around a woman he likes. It shows he feels good being around you and therefore he wants to be around you more. He is definitely into you but is probably too scared to tell you.

What to do

You will have to help him break out of his shell. Try to extend the conversation every time. Give him some sign to show him that you like spending time with him; and that you are also interested in him.

3. He loves to highlight his accomplishments

A guy who is intimidated by you will try to unconsciously convince you and him that he is worthy of you. So, he will somehow manage to mention his GPA, his position on the Lacrosse team and the fantastic presentation he made at the managerial meeting yesterday.

He will try to grab your attention with the story of how he rescued a small boy at the pool and how good he is at playing the electric guitar. You might mistake this for bragging, but he is only trying to impress you. He is intimidated by your resume, so he is decorating his.

What to do

Even though this can be exasperating, see the upside. This is his way of trying to impress you. Indulge him a little while and then change the subject to more important things.

4. He might avoid talking about himself

Opposite of bragging, he may avoid talking about his life: income, career, and spending habits. Since this guy is unnerved by you, he will not take the chance of exposing his weakness by talking to you about himself. He would rather talk about your achievements.

This is actually a good strategy. The more he talks about you, the more he learns about you and in the process he might find some common things and interests that you two share.

What to do

Try to extend your conversations with him. Accept his compliments and show him that you enjoy talking to him. This will give him more confidence to share the less glorious aspects of his life.

5. He is there when you need him

If you have a difficult situation and he gets to know of it, he will do even the impossible to solve it. This is his moment to shine, and his actions will say everything that his words have failed to say. He wants to show you he has many admirable attributes: he is supportive, sensitive and trustworthy. He will go the extra mile to make it up for what he lacks financially and professionally.

What to do

If you genuinely like the guy, reciprocate his kind gestures by being there for him during his own challenging situations. Also, let him know how grateful you are for his help.

A guy likes a woman who appeals to his inner hero. When he does all these things for you, it makes him feel manly. Do not ruin his fun by telling him how you are perfectly capable of doing whatever he wants to do for you. Let him feel that he is a man: let him carry the heavy items for you and tell him that you appreciate it. Something like ‘Thanks, I could use muscles like yours more often’ will get the point across.

Let him defend and protect you (even if you really do not need it).

Signs a Guy Likes You But is Intimidated - Man not sure how to act when with beautiful woman

6. He is awkward around you

He may be intimidated by the process of meeting someone he likes, so when/if he gets the courage to talk to you it can be awkward. Odd and bland conversation topics, him being awkward with his gestures.

What to do

Wait it out. He will get there eventually. If you want to see more of his normal side, then ask him about something he cares a lot about. It could be his job/hobby or something he follows (like sports or something science related).

7. He is insecure and jealous

Since he is unable to confess his feelings for you, he is also worried that another guy will attract your attention. Any man who seems to enjoy your presence triggers his hot button: your neighbor, colleagues, and other male friends.

Understand that he is worried that he is not good enough for you and that another man will successfully pursue you and hijack his chance of being with you. This may actually be the only time a guy who is feeling intimidated will act as though he really likes you.

What to do

Do not hold back from socializing with other people just because you fear his reaction. This will form the basis for controlling you, and you will eventually resent him for it. After all, he has not even admitted his feelings for you. He knows what he needs to do, let him do it.

Ultimately

Experts say that men are not concerned about your accomplishments. The one thing that the man cares about is how you make him feel. The man wants the feminine, kind, nurturing woman lurking inside that investment banker, fitness instructor, or top-notch attorney.

So, you know what to do:

  • Get in touch with your softer side and allow your feminine energy to shine.
  • Do not send a guy an email after a date; let him pursue you
  • Tell him your preference, then let him lead: hail the cab, choose the table, open doors you get the drift.
  • Do not talk about work on your date.
  • Dress up: wear light makeup, soft colors, a dress and heels on your dates. It makes him feel important to you.

Thanks for reading this guide on Signs a Guy Likes You But is Intimidated. You can get on the private newsletter and really amp up your chances to meet your dream guy.

Should You Ignore Him to Get His Attention? The Pros and Cons of Playing It Cool…

Ignore Him to Get His Attention - Woman not happy she cant get attention from man

Ignore Him to Get His Attention - Woman not happy she cant get attention from man

WHAT SHOULD YOU DO IF YOU CAN'T GET HIS attention?

Either you seem him occasionally and he seems not to notice you at all?

Or maybe you are with him every day, but he seems hardly aware of your presence. 

The natural instinct for many women is to pursue the guy. They dress up and doll up hoping that he will finally notice them. They go out of their way to be extra friendly to him, and even smother him with attention.

However, experts say that this approach could not be more wrong. Chasing a guy is going against the natural order of things.

To catch a guy’s attention, the right strategy is to be ‘unavailable’.

Why you shouldn't chase him

If you chase him, he will run

If you pursue a man, you will scare him away. Some men interpret pursuing them as neediness on your part.

A man will be attracted to you more if he knows that you are independent and have a lot of options. If you are not difficult to get, then you are not worth having.

Men love to do the chasing

Experts say that when a man is chasing a woman, he is fulfilling his natural instincts. A guy loves to pursue a woman who is a little bit out of reach because of the challenge.

Every guy wants something unique in the woman he chooses; something special that no other man has been able to attain. It is a macho thing. A man loves the adventure that goes into wooing a girl.

Chasing you will make a guy feel manlier: the winner who successfully hunted and caught the object of his affection.

To be successful in your relationship, you must allow your man to feel like he is the only guy in the world that could have won you; that it was his unique blend of charisma and charm that finally won you over.

You love to be chased

Let us be honest; you love to be chased. You

  • Do not want to feel like you forced yourself to the guy
  • Want to be sure that this incredible guy was not just looking for a relationship with anyone
  • Want to know that it was you and only you that he was interested in.

It isn't a silly thing. It's the best way to know that he wants you and you will feel secure with him.

The PROS: Why you should ignore the guy

Ignoring a guy makes him feel that you is not readily available; that he must work harder to impress you. Experts advise that a woman must make the man feel that he worked hard to get her. Making yourself huntable adds value to your worth. Ignoring a guy, therefore, comes with immense benefits.

It helps him understand your worth

You must understand one thing: if the man you are attracted to has a lot going for him, he is already receiving a lot of attention from the girls and his ego is ballooning.

So, you should not treat him the way every other admirer out there is treating him. You must make him realize that he will not have you easily like he did other girls previously. This is what will set your relationship with him apart from the ones he has had.

You must be emotionally mature to set the right pace for your relationship. Emotional maturity means not allowing your feelings to lead you astray.

How do you want to be treated in that relationship? This is the best time to set the ground rules. Creating some distance will give a guy the opportunity to prove himself. Your emotional maturity and self-worth will surprise the guy and he will chase you.

It releases pressure on the guy

Sometimes the guy may be distracted for reasons that have nothing to do with you. Maybe things are not going well at work; or things are not going his way in the share market. As a result, he might not want to talk to you or to talk at all.

Men define themselves by what they see as their level of ‘success’. This could be their financial ability and the success of their career. If this ‘success’ is threatened, they will go quiet as they try to figure out a way to fix things.

Badgering him when he is going through a rough patch will be counterproductive. Let him know that you are there for him if he needs you but give him the space that he needs.

Sometimes a man needs to stew in his man cave and lick his wounds. He will value you for giving him the space that he needed.

The CONS: Can ignoring a guy backfire?

While ignoring a guy shows him that you are independent, playing hard to get with someone you are interested in can be counterproductive. Playing it too cool early in the relationship robs you of the opportunity to be really present. Guys are insecure beings too, and they need a sign that you are interested.

The downside to ignoring him

  • If he is not sure about how you feel about him, sometimes, ignoring him can be seen as validation. ‘If she ignores me, she must be seeing someone else’. Therefore, ignoring a guy becomes the yardstick to determine that you not are attracted to him.
  • A guy can ignore you by accident by being too busy or too wrapped up in his own affairs to adequately attend to things around him. If you ignore him, you do not achieve anything.
  • Better still a guy could be ignoring you for all the right reasons; he is attracted to you too much and he is trying not to appear needy and desperate.

In these situations, ignoring the guy will not get you the results that you desire.

‘Ignore' him the right way

Ignoring a guy is a delicate balance of making him think you are ignoring him and letting him believe that he has a chance. When you ignore a man, he must feel that he only has to work harder to win you. You should not disregard a guy completely: you will lose him. Always give him hope but do not make it obvious.

While at it, do not mope around waiting for him to notice you. If you wait patiently, you will wait a long while. Be smart and speed up the process by loving yourself.

Engage in confidence-boosting activities: do something that you really enjoy and look your best. Every time you see each other, let him find a confident, independent woman. Be kind to yourself and he will not be able to resist you.

Finally,

You do not want the chase to be temporary. After the guy has got you, he might realize it was all an illusion and you are not really the high-value woman he had made you out to be. You want to make the chase permanent.

A man will chase and commit to a woman whose world he wants to become part of. A woman who is passionate with an exciting world around her will attract an amazing man who will chase her for a very long time.

So… Raise your standards for love

Do not ever settle for less in your relationship. Keep your self-worth intact and do not lose sight of yourself. Your guy should know that if he ever cheats on you, or abuses you in any way, you will go back to your amazing single life.

It sounds like this is for you, but it is for him also. It lets him know he has to be his best, and that will keep him chasing you for the rest of your relationship.

8 Things Guys Do to Get Your Attention – How You Can Hack the Male Mind

Things Guys Do to Get Your Attention

Things Guys Do to Get Your Attention

HE LIKES ME…………… He likes me not.

Few things are as tortuous and confusing as trying to figure out whether a guy is attracted to you or not.

The situation is further complicated by the fact that men are not the greatest communicators. Guys find it especially difficult to tell girls how they really feel about them. As a result, they are more comfortable communicating their feelings with their actions.

While some signs of attraction and interest are more evident than others, it is pretty easy to know when a guy likes you when you know what signs to look out for.

1. It is in his body language

The body language speaks volumes where words fail. So, pay close attention and see if you can identify some of the following subtle behaviors:

  • Eye contact: If a guy likes you, he will use eye contact to convey interest. Naturally, people’s eyes wander around the room, but if it feels like he cannot tear his eyes from you, he might just be attracted to you.
  • A light touch: People touch the people they like. There is no better way to determine that a guy has romantic feelings towards you than when he looks for every excuse to touch you. He will pick lint off your jacket, gently guide you towards the door, and regularly brush your arm ‘accidentally.’
  • The way he faces: Does he typically face you with his feet when he’s in the same vicinity? Feet direction is thought to be more likely a subconscious choice due to their distance from the brain. If his feet are usually facing you, then it is an indication that he is thinking of you.
  • Leaning inward: A guy will lean towards a girl that he likes and distance himself from the ones he does not like. He will angle his pelvis to face you when you are standing and lean in when you are seated.

2. He asks you personal questions

A guy who is interested in you will want to know everything about you. He will, therefore, ask you a lot of questions. By enquiring about your personal life, he is hoping to get to know you better and also create a bond between the two of you. And he will want to know about it all:  your childhood, your family, your goals and even your fears.

Furthermore, this says a lot about his intelligence: he knows that as human beings, we have many sides and shades within us that we offer to the world. Asking questions is his way of trying to know the real you.

Asking you about yourself also indicates that he is enjoying his time with you. It is an easy and stress-free way to sustain a conversation and keep the dialogue flowing.

While listening to you helps him to get to know you better, it also gives him the opportunity to show you how much you mean to him.

Does he ask you questions about your work? About your family? About your upbringing? Does he recall specific information and topics you once talked about? Does he remember the smallest details from your past conversations? Yep, he is definitely falling for you.

3. He does everything to stand out and fend off competition.

A guy who likes you will do everything to impress you. He might show off his physical strength and bring up stories and anecdotes about his life that he knows will make him stand out. In some cases, even the most modest guy will become a bit of a show off around you. This is especially the case if a guy is the quiet type; he will feel compelled to brag about his accomplishments to impress you.

A guy who is attracted to you will also amp the risk factor when he is around you. It is not uncommon for a guy to intentionally put himself in the face of danger to catch your attention. Guys know women are attracted to bold and fearless males. And they are likely to deploy this strategy when an opportunity arises.

It is for the same reason that a guy will leap mindlessly to your defense, in something that he has no idea what it is all about; whether it is in social situations or on social media. He wants you to see him as your knight in shining armor.

Does he drive recklessly fast when he is with you? Now you know; he is very attracted to you.

4. He pays special attention to you.

If you are in a crowd of people, a man who is smitten will give you more attention than anyone else present. You can test it out: Move away from the group that he is in. Say you need a drink or something. Then don’t return. If he likes you, he will try to catch your eye across the room, or even follow you.

He will be sensitive to your moods, and he can tell when you are going through something. So, the next time he is pushing you to tell him whether everything is ok, take it as a compliment and not nagging. It just means that he cares much more than you probably realized.

Does he notice that you have changed the way you do your hair? Or that you are putting on different makeup? Wonder no more: he definitely likes you.

5. He wants to make your life easier

A guy who likes you will take care of you to his best of abilities. He will go out of his way to do nice things for you. It could be something as small as carrying your shopping bags. Does the guy:

  • Open the car door for you?
  • Open up the water bottle for you?
  • Bring you coffee?
  • Give you a ride home?
  • Help to set up your new TV?
  • Lend you his jacket when it is cold?
  • Offer to drive you to the airport when you have to catch a flight?

These small gestures indicate one thing: the guy is into you.

A quick note on shy guys

When I grew up I was shy. And shy guys act a little differently around girls that they like.

6. He may completely ignore you

Fear of rejection is a big thing for guys, especially when they are in public. It takes a lot of boldness for a guy to put himself in a position to be publicly rejected. So what does the guy do: he ignores you completely. Or he could ignore you when you are in the larger society, but talk to you when you are alone.

7. He opens up when you two are alone (or when he feels comfortable)

Is he completely oblivious to your presence when there are other people around but cheers up the moment the two of you are alone together? No doubt, he likes you, but he is intimidated, shy and/or scared.

This doesn’t make him any less of a man. He may have simply grown up with an overbearing parent/sibling/relative and simply isn’t sure what to do next with you.

8. He tries to predict something about you or tell you about yourself

If he doesn’t know better, it’s his way of telling you that he has thought about you. It can be cute (and less annoying) if you think of it that way.

Final word

In a study published by psychological Science, researchers discovered that women underestimate the amount of romantic interest shown to them by men. As such, by the time you start noticing gestures that indicated that a guy likes you, he will be deeply attracted to you.

You, therefore, need to decide quickly on what you will do about the situation. If you are interested in the guy, give your own signs that you are also into him. Meet him halfway; reciprocate by doing nice things for him.

If you are not interested in the guy, do not try to take advantage of his interest in you. Let him know immediately, and you might just get yourself a wonderful friend.

More information

Do you ever feel like you don't understand men? Like you have no idea how he's feeling or what he will do next? If this sounds like you then this short video will change your relationships with men forever.

In it, James Bauer describes the number one driving force in a mans brain and how he tries to satisfy it in everything that he does. Watch it now, your future self will thank you!

Thanks for reading Things Guys Do to Get Your Attention. If you have any comments questions or queries you can contact me here.